Ladies & Gentlemen:
As one of your employers it has come to my attention that there are certain things going on during the course of your employment with our organization that need to be straightened out before they’ve gone too far to reverse, which I fear may already be the case in some of them.
Perhaps the first thing you all need is a stern reminder of who you work for. We seem to have arrived at a situation that can only be described as the tail not only wagging the dog but attempting to shake it to smithereens. I’m sure you’ll all agree when I say that this can not be allowed to continue.
You were not hired to rule this country, you were hired to represent the people of this country and I’m quite sure that even the most ignorant among you are capable of grasping that distinction. Well, except for Jim Inhofe, who would require several years of intense tutoring to have the IQ of a brick but that’s a problem for the just as brain dead people in Oklahoma that keep voting for him.
This whole business of fancy limousines, first class air travel, unlimited credit cards and million dollar a year expense accounts has obviously gone to the heads of many of you, creating inflated self images that require continuous infusions of large amounts of cash for their care and upkeep. To that end, many of you have sought and received sources of additional income that far exceed anything we poor taxpayers can afford and this has inevitably led to a major paradigm shift in your allegiance and loyalty to those who can afford to pay the most for it.
Most if not all of you have managed to amass fortunes all out of proportion to the salaries and benefits you receive for representing your constituents, perhaps the prime example being Senator Addison Mitchell McConnell (R-Koch Bros), who has managed an average take of roughly a million dollars a year over his nearly 30 years of “service” while never once doing anything that was of any significant benefit to either the people of Kentucky or the citizens of the country as a whole. Mr. McConnell (left) could serve as the poster boy for cheap grifters with no redeeming social value , his venality exceeding even that of that of Sarah Palin and the message sent to the rest of the country by his home state of Kentucky, having rewarded his almost defiantly open embrace of graft and corruption with five terms in the senate to continue amassing his personal fortune at the expense of just about everyone else, is not one to be taken lightly.
I would suggest that if they return him to office yet again in 2014, the rest of us either force the State of Kentucky to secede or, barring that particular form of self deportation, cut off all federal funding to the state and let them seek to do without the money they rake in from the federal government they profess to hate and which exceeds the amount they pay in taxes.
After all, if we can’t support our immigrant communities who actually work and pay taxes and contribute to our society, why should we support an entire state full of deadbeats who take more than they give and who inflict people like Mr. McConnell and Rand Paul on the rest of us as a matter of routine?
And please, spare us any self righteous bullshit. What I just said about Mr. McConnell applies to each and every one of you to some degree or other. Every one of you has, immediately upon taking office, set yourself up as some petty little noble ruling over a personal little fiefdom and spewing little more than contempt and disdain for the “rabble” who labor under the mistaken impression that you work for them. Some of you may not yet have developed the “eff you” attitude to the degree… or be as open about it… as Mitch McConnell has but the simple fact is that most of you eventually come around to thinking you were elected to rule over us and not to serve us and from there it’s only a short quick step to deciding you’re worth more than we pay and going to work for those who offer more for your services than we possibly can.
And that’s when not only democracy but the entire concept of a “representative republic” dies.